Nourishment For The Soul

*Mid week, last week.

Her: How are you feeling about the concert on the weekend?
Me: Excited … I think … mostly … ugh … I’m pretty nervous … why am I doing this?
Her: Nervous, really?
Me: I haven’t done this in three years … what if I forget how to be up there!?
Her: I’m sure you’ll be great but whatever happens, I hope it nourishes your soul.
Me: <3

Have you seen the Venn diagram with the 2 overlapping circles illustrating narcissism and crippling self doubt and how those things are common denominators of artists? I laughed out loud the first time I saw it. I think I felt just a little bit attacked. It’s a particularly weird dichotomy for a guy like me who straddles the line of introvert/extrovert. I’ve often said I’m a professional extrovert but my true nature is more introverted. I love to make people happy and for whatever reason, I’ve managed to have a little success entertaining people through stage, music and radio adventures through the years but at my core, I’m ridiculously insecure. I live for the compliments but I curl up and die a little inside every time I hear one.

Last month, Ally and I took in a play at the Livery Theatre in Goderich. One of the stars of the show was an old teacher/mentor of mine and my friend now for more than 40 years. Warren Robinson was one of my English/Drama teachers in high school and was one of the first to believe in me and encourage me to pursue my hunger to entertain. Seeing him on stage was amazing. Aside from his wonderful acting skills, he did what he’s always done with me … made me hungry to get back up there.

On Sunday, I had an opportunity to get back up there with some genuinely great humans and musicians. Most of the anxiety of the days prior faded quickly during rehearsal on Saturday when the band just settled in behind me and carried me through my songs. On Sunday, the audience came ready to have fun and gave us all the encouragement and support and positive vibes we needed to really enjoy ourselves.

Huge thanks goes to Thomas Beard and the Beard family for all the hard work they did to assemble musicians, arrange and promote the show and give us all a chance to play and enjoy live music again. Having done it, I am very aware of the amount of work it takes to make a show like that happen and the Beard family’s commitment to it … and to our community is not unnoticed.

It’s definitely a different kind of experience these days with the threat of Covid still hanging over our heads. The pandemic is far from gone and thoughts of it are an undercurrent of every experience we have when we leave our houses. And yes, it played in the background of my thoughts on Sunday too but in the end, the joy of playing with great musicians and friends made for an experience that did indeed, nourish my soul.

Until next time friends, here are a few images captured by my favourite photographer. A few from my rehearsal with the band “High Street Music” on Saturday and then the show on Sunday.

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Categorised in: Blogs, Mornings

This post was written by Phil Main