The View From Here – What If

We had our work Christmas party today.  On Zoom.  Almost an hour of being very aware of my face on camera.  Ick.  I HATE video meetings and chats.  It’s been one of the hardest adjustments to this pandemic world.  So much online.

Mute. Unmute.  Awkward silence.  The feed cutting in and out.  Talking over each other.  Repeating yourself.  Wearing real clothes.  (kidding)

It’s been nine months since I’ve seen all my co-workers in one place. Even if it’s only in a small square.  One voice at a time.

It was nice to feel part of a group again.  But I have to be honest, what if I don’t know how to go back to work?

What if this pandemic way of life is hard to recover from in more ways than one?

I enjoy working from home.   The slower pace.  Access to a fully stocked kitchen whenever I need.

I love being there with my kids.  Even my cat, who has gotten so used to me being home, he pretty much ignores me and sleeps most of the day away.

How will I ever return to the crazy pace that was once my life?  Rushing around in the mornings to get out the door on time?  Packing lunches.  Wearing REAL clothes?

It feels so strange to even think about.

The thought of being normal again is almost something I’m afraid of.  Just being honest.

I’ve gotten used to staying home.  Isolating.  Being by myself.   It’s comfortable.  But I’m a shy girl at heart.  It’s easy to stay home.  It’s easy to avoid people when that’s who you are.

I hope there’s a grace period when this is all said and done.

Categorised in: Afternoons

This post was written by Carrie Buchanan